19th May 2010

So, sold quite a bit of my maternity stuff on ebay, there are a few bits left, which I re-listed, but still didn’t sell, so I’ll stick them back up in the loft for now.

Dad was in for a hip replacement, but we were all loaded with the cold, and as we didn’t want to risk passing on infection in hospital, we weren’t able to visit. Spoke on the phone a few times though, with CJ saying how the doctor was going to fix papa’s sore leg. We visited once he was home, he’s looking a little peaky, but ok. CJ was so cute, DH asked him if he kissed papa’s sore leg better, he looked at DH like he was daft and said “no, doctor fixed it!”


Had another lovely weekend at the caravan. The weather was fab, and we had a picnic on the beach. Stuck a windbreaker up – you have no idea what a difference it made! Clear blue skies, the blue sea, waves crashing on the beach – we could have been anywhere! Hardly saw a soul, just the odd dog walker. DH and CJ were hiding in the long grass at the sand dunes, while the dog patiently waited on someone throwing her stick in the sea.


Still having the odd wobble, just keep thinking what a lovely bump I would have now. I know until the due date I’ll keep thinking of what stage of the pregnancy I should be at, and I also know how tough the due date is going to be. Looking at booking a holiday, or even just making sure we are away at the caravan then.

4th May 2010

Well, finally done it – put all my maternity stuff on Ebay. In a way it helped me, as long as they are still under our roof, they’ll be a constant “what if?”

Went upstairs and took photos of everything and came across a t-shirt I loved when I was pregnant. Got it at Next Clearance, it is a pale blue/green with “Baby Face” on the front. Took off my shirt and pulled it on – it felt so nice, so I kept it on. Unfortunately it just looked a wee bit baggy! Also found my lush M&S maternity jammies, a three piece set that cost £50, black with cream lace – no way they’re going on Ebay, only wore them a handful of times!

Anyway DH stuck his head round the bedroom and asked if I was alright, told him I was fine, was glad to be rid of everything, stuck most of it on at 99p start bids just to get it away. It was only once I was back downstairs I realised why he was so concerned; I was still wearing my “Baby Face” t-shirt!

While CJ was in the bath I sat on the loo and took in the waistband of my fancy pj’s!

Had a check on my items and someone has already bid on my bump bands and some Inch Blue shoes I had bought for CJ but never wore on him.

So I am sitting here writing this in jammies I can pull up under my bust, remembering how I felt like a proper yummy mummy in the maternity ward, and how wonderful it was to hold my precious bundle wrapped in his soft blue blanket against my chest. But, I’m ok, I lived the dream that I thought would never come true, and I continue to live it every day with CJ and my DH. It’s ok if we never have another, at one point we thought we would never have any.