Apologies folks, been missing in action, but I think you can understand why! Firstly we had to finish decorating the living room, which is looking fab. Our old retro fireplace actually looks pretty cool now, rather than sticking out like a sore thumb as it did before. DH and my dad put up some nice coving which really finishes off the room – wish we had done it before now! Check out the wee man helping daddy!!


CJ’s birthday party was great, managing to take place in almost every room in the house. He has a playroom (I know, very indulgent of us, but it saves the new living room carpet, lol) which was full of all his wee pals, and a few mums, the dining room fire was lit, so you had all the nostalgic ones nibbling while being hypnotised by the flames. The living room had the majority of the adults, while poor DH was an almost permanent feature in the kitchen keeping on top of the oven and drinks.

We then had CJ starting nursery. His “settling in” days went really well. He toddled off into the room without a backward glance to me to play with the sandpit! The teacher told me I could leave for half an hour if I wanted, as he was so settled, so I did! Can’t tell you how strange it was to be wandering round the shops without him, I say shops, but it was only one, I was too scared to go too far away! When I went to collect him, he didn’t want to leave! His second day was a bit tearier. The teacher told me to leave him within minutes of us walking through the door, I called her half an hour later to see how he was, and apparently he had been quite upset, but he was fine now. His first proper day was a little more distressing, you can’t sneak away, you have to say goodbye – eek! Not fun, but again, he settled down fine. He is only in two half days a week, and by the third week, he was absolutely fine, thank goodness!

So, back to our treatment cycle - this is what my diary read like;

29 October Prostap
9 November acupuncture
16 November acupuncture
23 November acupuncture
25 November start nasal spray
30 November GRI
1 December acupuncture & start daily injections
7 December acupuncture
8 December GRI
10 December GRI
11 December DH acupuncture
12 December last nasal spray 5pm, HCG booster injection 7.30pm
13 December no food or water after midnight
14 December 8.30am egg collection operation
15 December Phone GRI for fertilisation results
17 December Phone GRI for biopsy results & start Gestone injections
18 December Embryo transfer 2.30pm, acupuncture 3.30pm
21 December acupuncture
29 December test date

It was great being thrown into the cycle, rather than having too much time to think about it, however, it was a completely different experience this time – you name the side affect, I had it! I don’t know if it was because I was older, or because I have already had a pregnancy, but everything was more intense. Splitting sore heads, bad temper, vaginal dryness, I even had chronic trapped wind (the burping kind!) and ended up at the out of hours emergency doctor, doubled in two getting a shot of Buscipan in my bum and a prescription for peppermint capsules and Buscipan tablets! I was on the phone to a midwife on the NHS 24 service, explaining everything, the treatment, my side affects – the sore head, the sore stomach, when she said she thought what I was doing was amazing, wished me luck and said she hoped to see me in nine months time, I was choking up with tears.

Egg collection had to be done on a Monday, so that hopefully by the Thursday the embryos would have eight cells and could have the biopsy. This was done by the embryologist at GRI and sent over to the geneticist at Yorkhill.


So, as you can imagine, I wanted to make sure everything was in place for Christmas, so that after embryo transfer I could sit with my feet up with nothing to worry about. Believe it or not, I actually managed this! We got the tree up on the 6th December, a wee bit early I suppose, but it was great to see CJ’s face! We got the lights up outside too, so the place was looking really Christmassy!!

Monday 14th, mum and dad came over just after 7am to watch CJ and we left just before 7.30. It was a bit surreal being back in the Assisted Conception Suite, and I had butterflies in my stomach. You have to have an empty bladder before the operation which was no problem as nerves made me nip to the loo three times!

When I came round in the recovery room, DH was waiting for me. I felt shattered and had really enjoyed my anaesthetic induced sleep, but couldn’t drop off again as I was desperate to know how many eggs we got. It was 12 – not bad for an old bird!!

When we got home, I got into my jammies and curled up on the couch, fortunately DH had the rest of the day off and CJ was quite happy to play in the living room and watch Handy Manny.

I called the embryologist the next morning and was chuffed to hear eight out of the twelve had fertilised. Fingers crossed for eight cells by Thursday.

CJ’s Christmas Carol Concert and party at nursery was so cute. The children were singing a selection of Christmas songs to an audience of proud mums, dads and grannies. I had such a huge lump in my throat watching CJ doing the actions to Away in a Manger.

Amazingly all eight embryos had eight cells, so all had the biopsy!

Well – what a miracle CJ is – out of eight embryos, three were “normal” so we had two transferred which the doctor said were compacting nicely, the other wasn’t suitable for freezing. The nurse called me a gluten for punishment when she heard we were having two transferred, but as it took four attempts to have CJ (Ok, so we didn’t know the quality of embryo being transferred) and I am 37 in April, we felt two was better odds, although I was a little apprehensive if I’m honest.

We took a Christmas card addressed to Helen Walton and all ACS staff and a box of chocolates with us. All the staff are so nice, and let’s face it; they see couples at their lowest, so it must be a hard environment to work in. We were in and out within 15 minutes, which meant we had 45 minutes to waste before my acupuncture appointment. The optimum time to have acupuncture after transfer is within 40 minutes, so I called and as Maureen wasn’t with anyone, I could come straight down. Brilliant!

After acupuncture, it was back to the couch with a fleece blanket round my waist to keep my back and tum warm. Refer to embies as Holly and Ivy – festive!

A couple of days before Christmas we took CJ to see Santa, and looking at him all shy, I actually felt a little guilty at the thought of another child being around and distracting me from him. He’s amazing, a proper miracle and wee character, but at the same time, when I see him in the company of other children, I can’t bear the thought of him being an only child.

Christmas was lovely, very relaxing. My mother-in-law came over in the morning for about an hour, and then my mum and dad came over in the afternoon, before heading to my sisters. CJ got to spend all day playing with his toys – his face when he saw “Big Chris” sticking out of his stocking was a picture – and I got to spend all day in a jogging suit! Dh keeps asking how Holly and Ivy are, I tell him as long as one of them are ok, that’s fine by me! The thought of twins is actually quite scary.

I did a cheeky Clearblue, as it was a few days early and we were still doing the Gestone injections, I wasn’t sure how accurate the reading would be. There was a very faint line – more like a shadow, and we put it down to the Gestone.

Test day – no denying the line now – clear as anything! Off to GRI for a blood test. I recognised one of the couples in the waiting room from egg collection day, it was hard to read their faces and demeanour, so not sure how they got on. The nurse asked if my period had arrived and I told her no, so she said she would keep her fingers crossed.

Helen Walton called just after 1pm and said I was most definitely pregnant, she said I had made her Christmas! I told her she had just made ours, and could feel my voice shaking. Although the test that morning had said I was pregnant, it was hard to believe until Helen confirmed it!

I texted a couple of friends who knew we were doing the cycle and called my mum while DH called his. My mum was so excited and said she knew all along this one was going to work! Dad was babysitting for my sister so they both got the news at the same time. Everyone was so excited, but I was actually scared to get carried away. Dejavu to when we finally got pregnant with CJ!

We got a letter through from GRI with our early scan date, 21st January at 3pm. It was a Thursday, so CJ would be in nursery, also I would be roughly seven weeks, so not too early.

I finally managed to get back to acupuncture on the 12th January. Rhona was over the moon when she saw me, and gave me a huge hug!

13th January is my nieces 2nd birthday and CJ and I pop over after nursery. He had great fun running around, and again, all going well, I’m glad he won’t be an only child.

15th January is DH’s birthday. We were supposed to be going out for a meal on the Sunday night, but almost every member of my family has been taken down one after the after with a sickness bug. It is my babysitters (mum and dad!) turn now! Aw well, not to worry, we can do it another time!

18th January is mums birthday (I know, all these birthdays right after Christmas!) so a quick visit, so we don’t catch anything!!

Finally Thursday 21st January! We were the only people in the waiting room – a first – it’s normally packed. One of the nurses, Linda, sticks her head round the door, she told us she was supposed to be doing the scan, but Helen wanted to do ours! I was actually quite pleased, it was nice for Helen to hopefully see the result of all her planning!

Now, it’s an early scan, so it’s internal. I’m lying back, unable to see anything and Dh is sitting next to my head, watching Helen and Lindas faces. Well, said Helen, it’s two. I pulled my head up and said, you’re joking! No, definitely two! I couldn’t stop laughing – it was pure nerves, I actually wanted to cry. DH told me afterwards, he saw Helens eyebrows arch and she bit her lip to hide a smile, Linda had looked at the screen and grinned, so he knew it was good news. Helen and Linda were full of smiles and made us promise to bring the babies in when they were born. Helen said she would let all the staff involved with the PGD know, they would be delighted too. We had to go back to the waiting room to get some paperwork from another nurse. I got out my mobile and took a photo of the scan picture and sent it to my mum, sister and friend Mary with the heading “Holy crap, it’s twins!


When the nurse lifted our file and came to get us, she looked inside the cover and burst out laughing! Hoho, what a handful! C’mon you two! I could feel my bottom lip wobble. We had a nice chat and she was talking about how much CJ will enjoy the babies, and what great pals they’ll be. About how DH and the dog can move out into the garage, lol! She also told us we would get extra scans and an extra eye kept on us. We got our paperwork and left. I called my mum when we got outside, she couldn’t stop laughing either! On the way back to the car, DH asked what was worrying me, and again, I thought I was gong to burst into tears! I felt awful and ungrateful, but I was so scared. I was scared for all the things that could go wrong, I was feeling bad for CJ, how will he feel with not one but two new babies in the house. I was petrified of Downs, CJ had a 1-9 chance of Downs, so what would be the odds for these two, and how dangerous are the tests for twins? I told him I had thought of single embryo transfer, but thought my age made it pointless. When DH and I got in the car, he told me stop worrying, it’s done, we can’t go back, and think about it, five years we thought we would have no children, now there will be three. Think how much fun CJ will have with two wee ones to play with, think of our house full of noise, to be honest I’m really excited about it. Told him I knew he was right, I gave myself a shake, but couldn’t quite get rid of the worry that easy.

I made an appointment with my GPs midwife for Monday at 2.45. Hopefully she can shed some light on what tests are available etc. I could not get to sleep that night and again DH tried to put my mind at rest and make me realise how lucky we were. I can’t tell you how guilty I felt especially when I thought of my mate Mary waiting to start a medicated FET cycle. I thought of how she would feel if she were in my position, and that almost gave me the kick up the bum I needed, but I know I won’t relax until I know everything is ok.

Anyway, I’m starting to come round now, I’m imagining how their room will be (ours, we’ll move downstairs to DH’s office, he’ll get thrown out into the garage) and looking online at what rear facing twin prams are available – very few by the way – the Firstwheels City twin looks good! We’ve discussed what we’ll have to do with regards to the car, and chatted about the caravan we wanted to get this year – that’ll be a five berth!!